It's one of those days again.
I feel happy, but also sad at the same time.
So today I decided to bake cupcakes for the bake sale. I didn't make it last night because it would be cold by the time we have the bake sale. And I decided that it would be better if we had warm cupcakes to sell. I had decided that I would wake up really really early in the morning to make it, but my mom just told me to make it at church. I didn't want my mom to miss Sunday School, since it's so important to her. Not that Sunday School isn't important to me, but I was compelled to try to do this myself.
I didn't ask Judy and Lily to help, since I didn't want to take too many people away from Sunday School. Didn't ask Josh either, since he was the only person there at the time, for Sunday School. I didn't want to ask Shawn to help, since I didn't want too many people missing from the high school boy's Sunday School either. But Allen was just like "come help." I at first didn't want Allen to help out either, since I didn't want him to miss Sunday School and because he's not a high schooler, but I decided that I would just let him help since I was guessing that not many people would be able to help out.
I called Phillip to see if he could help, since we only had three people versus 72 cupcakes to make, and they usually don't come to Sunday School, but his parents didn't let him.
Then Christina came in with a plate of cookies, and Shawn asked her to help out.
In the end, I'm glad that they all decided to help out. Because I would have never been able to finish making those cupcakes by myself.
I found that the cupcakes we made, although some of them a little burnt or crumbled, were baked with all our combined efforts and our dedication to the bake sale, so that's probably the reason why they looked so good.
And while we were making the cupcakes, though Allen and Shawn sometimes goofed off and frustrated me and though my stomach was hurting, I didn't have a headache. I felt peaceful, like I could do this the rest of my life, and I felt...happy.
In the end, the credit goes to both the high schoolers and the middle shcoolers. I really have to applaud them for it.
Maybe they just thought it was fun to help out. But they still tried their best.
Watching them kind of reminded me of myself as a middle schooler. I miss those days...
If all of them continue to put their dedication to church, I think Flame will be a good position in the future.
But of course, people change. Their priorities may change, their personalities may change. I just hope that they have God as their first priority. I know I have failed in this, and more likely than not will fail in this in the future.
Many thanks to everyone who helped in the bake sale, whether it be making stuff for it or helping with selling or cleaning up after the mess we made in the kitchen, although most of them will never see this post.
I've learned that I can be truly happy when I'm doing something for God, no matter what people say or don't say. Though if people say, "Nice job!" that's definitely a plus. It was really encouraging to see so many people willing to donate and see their devotion to God and His work, although they might not know in detail what we'll use it for.
And because of the dedication of everyone who helped in the bake sell, whether making, selling, or buying, we were able to raise three hundred and six dollars and forty-two cents. That's triple and then some of our original budget, which was one hundred dollars.
This also taught me that if I give something my all, I won't get negative results (every time), and more importantly, I'll be truly content.
I also learned that sometimes, I have to let myself be helped by others.
But even with all this, I'm in a depressed mood.
I don't know why.
Must be one of those days, I guess.
On second thought, I'm not really that depressed, I just feel kind of down...
For an inexplicable and probably irrational reason...
Maybe I need a balance to how much happiness I feel each day. For example, I can only feel a specific amount of happiness, or I'll have to balance it out with sadness.
Whatever, I'm weird. And that's nothing new.
My headache started up recently, and my stomach still feels weird.
I'd forgotten to take my medicine this morning, so I can't take it now...
I really hope I don't have to live off of pills...I have to take at least three daily as of right now...Prilosec for stomach ache, a multivitamin (such as OneADay), and Zinc...Maybe Tylenol or Advil for headaches, but that usually never works.
I don't want to end this on a depressing note (for once, haha...), so I have to say that I'm really encouraged to see that our efforts haven't gone to waste.
And many people told us how well we did and thanked us for doing it, though the needn't have since they weren't obligated to help out in it.
True happiness is rarely felt by me, so this was definitely a positive experience.
I don't know how you will react to this post. Maybe you'll be like "ok, whatever....going on with my life." Maybe you'll have no reaction at all. Maybe you'll be encouraged.
But what is most important is finding what makes you content in this world.
I can't exactly say that I've definitely found it, but God has really shown me an important and humbling lesson.
"Each today, well-lived, makes yesterday a dream of happiness and each tomorrow a vision of hope. Look, therefore, to this one day, for it and it alone is life." - Sanskrit Poem
"Fame or integrity: which is more important? Money or happiness: which is more valuable? Success or failure: which is more destructive? If you look to others for fulfillment, you will never truly be fulfilled. If your happiness depends on money, you will never be happy with yourself. Be content with what you have; rejoice in the way things are. When you realize there is nothing lacking, the whole world belongs to you." - Lao-tzu
"Storybook happiness involves every form of pleasant thumb-twiddling; true happiness involves the full use of one's powers and talents." - John W. Gardner
"Again and again I therefore admonish my students in Europe and America: Don't aim at success -- the more you aim at it and make it a target, the more you are going to miss it. For success, like happiness, cannot be pursued; it must ensue, and it only does so as the unintended side effect of one's personal dedication to a cause greater than oneself or as the by-product of one's surrender to a person other than oneself. Happiness must happen, and the same holds for success: you have to let it happen by not caring about it. I want you to listen to what your conscience commands you to do and go on to carry it out to the best of your knowledge. Then you will live to see that in the long-run -- in the long-run, I say! -- success will follow you precisely because you had forgotten to think about it." - Viktor Frankl
"I am more and more convinced that our happiness or our unhappiness depends far more on the way we meet the events of life than on the nature of those events themselves." - Karl Wilhelm Von Humboldt
"Many persons have a wrong idea of what constitutes true happiness. It is not attained through self-gratification but through fidelity to a worthy purpose." - Helen Keller